Eleven Weeks

So, this week begins the final countdown of the first trimester. Little swimmy is the size of a large lime this week, and he or she will begin to grow exponentially in the next couple of weeks now that we're officially out of the embryonic stage and into the fetal stage.

I myself am (knock on wood) feeling less morning sickness these days, though I still wonder where the hell I put my get up and go. It is incredible how exhausted I am all of the time. It's like I've been working out like mad. I just want to sleep. Lately, I've even taken to an hour nap during my lunch break, which is more than a little pathetic. Mostly the only nausea I feel is if I go too long in between meals. My stomach gets p!ssed off and let's me know that, hey, it's freaking time to eat. We're starving in here. Ok, ok. Don't get your panties in a bunch. Down the ol' hatch.

We had another ultrasound last week, and little swimmy was wiggling all over in there, flailing his or her little arm buds all around. Must like English muffins and strawberry jam. What can I say, he or she has good taste. The ultrasound technician said everything looks ok. As you can see from the picture above, baby has a giant head (any of you who know the hubs and I know where this comes from- we both have fiveheads), little arm bods, and what looks like a pea pod for a lower half. All in all, it sort of looks like a little chicken tender to me. Mmm. Chicken tenders.

The only weird thing about the ultrasound is they had to do it internally again. BLAH. File this under questions you don't want asked before 9 am: "Are you allergic to latex?" Sigh, no. Apparently, I've got quite a tippy uterus. Awesome. Hopefully I don't wind up with a baby bump coming out of my back. Wouldn't that be tricky to shop for?

Ten Weeks!

Well, I am officially 1/4 of the way through this pregnancy! This week, baby is the size of a small plum (or a kumquat, depending on who you ask). I am starting to show a little bit. Not so that you'd notice unless I were in a bikini, and even then, it probably looks more like I need lay off the donuts than it does i've got a (cinnamon?) bun in the oven. Physically, the morning sickness is still there (joy!)- on the plus side, though, I read that women who experience morning sickness are less likely to miscarry. So I keep reminding myself that it's really a good thing. I am also EXHAUSTED. Like, sleep for 9 hours and can't pry my eyelids open in the morning exhausted. Today it was so bad, I actually had a nap at lunch. I feel better now- less tired, less pukey- so hopefully it will be a productive afternoon for me.

In honor of week ten, I have composed a top ten list of ways I am making this a healthy pregnancy:

1- Quit smoking, quit drinking. These are pretty much no brainers, but apparently, not all women feel this is truly necessary.

2- Take a prenatal vitamin every morning. I am also starting to take DHA as well to help little swimmy's developing brain. You know, cause I can't stand the smell of fish lately.

3- Eat boat loads of fruit. I can't seem to stomach too many veggies (unless of course they are marinated in balsamic and grilled), but I can't get enough fruit. I crave it! Especially white grapes. Oh lord, the things I'll do for white grapes.

4- Milk. I'm not usually a milk drinker, but between the daily yogurt and sometimes bowl of cereal, this child will have strong bones, by golly.

5- Exercise. I have been trying to get at least 4 (usually 5 days) of exercise in a week. I usually do walking at an incline or the elliptical for 35-40 minutes and also some weights. Some women swear this helps during labor. I sure hope so. Next up: finding a prenatal yoga class.

6- Water. I am, as a general rule, a diet coke junkie. However, once I found out I was knocked up, I switched to water. Although it doesn't really help with my frequent trips to the loo, I am surely well hydrated. It is also super yummy with lemon- which fingers crossed will help with the bloat. Yes, that's still there.

7- Fiber. God bless fiber one cereal. I was so miserable and constipated (sorry, TMI, I know), and with my recent to aversion to all things vegetable (except for the daily glass of V8), there was no relief in sight. Until I discovered the joy of fiber one. I tend to munch on the cereal bars, as I'm usually rushing out the door in the am, but the cereal's pretty yummy too.

8- Moisturize. I am purchasing some baby oil and cocoa butter this evening to moisturize my ever expanding chest and tummy in the hopes that I'll keep the stretch marks at bay.

9- Less processed foods. I've been reading about how baby's palate is formed during their time in the womb, and I'm trying to teach my little swimmy all the joys of naturally occurring foods. If only I could have my taste for veggies back, I'd be all set.

10- Sleep. Lots. And lots. In fact, I'm looking forward to not needing quite so much. I could use my get up and go.

Martini baby

This week is a very big week for little swimmy. Not only is he or she the size of a green olive (prompting the husband to immediately dub him or her "martini baby"), but also swimmy will go from being a reptilian-looking embryo to a more human-looking fetus. Go little swimmy!

As for me, I made my very first excursion into the maternity clothes section this weekend. Well, before that happened, I experienced what can only be classified as a Def-Con 5 Hormonal Meltdown, wherein I was screaming, crying, and flailing about for really no reason at all. Not really no reason. I only had one pair of shorts that fit my ever-expanding waistline. And for a woman with some body issues, this is not a good feeling.

Anyhow, the husband responded very kindly and suggested we go to the mall to find me some fat people (aka pregnant lady) clothes. WOW. Let me tell you- God bless the person who invented the elastic waistband. I have never been happier. AND, you get to buy clothes based upon your pre-pregnancy size! So while I am not exactly showing, I feel nothing but sweet, sweet relief in my giant pants. Also, the husband is thoroughly amused by the belly portion of the pants. Sheesh.

Morning Sickness

OMG, people. Morning sickness is for real.

This morning, I was just sitting at my desk working away, when I began to feel like a sneeze was coming on. And then it wasn't. You know that feeling, don't you, when a sneeze gets stuck? Awful. Except then I thought maybe I might be sick, so I decided to just put my head down for a minute. Then the nausea really came on, and I (more or less) ran down the hallway, praying that I'd make it to the bathroom before any cookies were tossed.

Thankfully, I did. But what an awful experience. I am just grateful that afterward, I felt more or less human again.

Truly hope this doesn't become an everyday thing. Goodness.

Holy boobs, batman!

Ok, so yesterday I broke down and went to Target to buy a couple of new bras. MY BOOBS ARE FREAKING HUGE. I mean, they have never been small, but they are blowing up! As I know they will only continue growing throughout my pregnancy, I am concerned I will run out of sizes in bras. Do they make an E sized bra? They must, right?

The only one who's happy about this is the husband. Unfortunately for him, they are quite painful. So there's a full-fledged look-but-don't-even-think-about-touching policy in place.

Poor bastard.

Our freaking air conditioner broke this weekend. Curse our stupid landlord and his property management company and their slow @ss AC contractor who doesn't have the right parts in his truck! We're going on 3 days without air conditioning. In Las Vegas. In August. While pregnant.

Kill me. Or I might kill someone myself.

First Ultrasound

So last Friday, the husband and I had our first ultrasound. I wasn't really sure what to expect--especially as my husband has never before accompanied me to the gynocologist's office. And yes, it was as awkward and wonderful as you can imagine. So, first the ultrasound tech has me drop trou and lift my dress, and they try to check out little swimmy with a sonogram. No dice. It's too small.

So then, she pulls out a condom, plops it on this long dildo-looking job and pops it right inside of me. I think I really embarrassed my husband when I told the doctor, "If that thing starts vibrating, I am out of here!" The doctor assured me there was no erotica involved. Thank goodness.

After the crude joke portion of the morning was over, we saw our little blob. That's pretty much what it looked like, as you can tell from the picture above. The technician pointed out little swimmy's flickering heartbeat, and we actually got to hear it for a brief second. It was one of the most amazing things I've ever seen. The scoop is that swimmy is officially 6 weeks and 5 days old as of the 6th. So today, swimmy is 7 weeks and 1 day old. Time flies.

Doc gave us the all clear to start telling friends and family the good news, which we've been doing, slowly. We're kind of savoring our little secret for a bit longer.

I feel as big as a house.

For the love of all that is good and holy, my clothes barely fit. I am sitting here, in my fat lady suit, and I swear, it is literally slicing into my muffin top. Oh lord, I am uncomfortable. And I am B-L-O-A-T-E-D. How is it possible for one woman to pee so much, and yet, pooping (yes, I went there) is but a distant memory. Women complain about morning sickness, but I swear to all that is holy, my ballooning abdomen full of God-knows-what is about a million times worse.

Week Six: Growing Pains

I have certainly felt the entire gamut of emotions this week: excited, happy, anxious, sad, and angry. The books are not kidding when they say your hormones are going bananas. They are. My skin looks like it did when I was about sixteen. And my stomach is huge. Not with baby. With bloat. And every once in a while, I feel a funny feeling in my stomach. I'm not talking nausea here, though I certainly feel that from time to time too. It's not quite a cramp, just a small amount of discomfort. The books say what I'm feeling are growing pains in my uterus. Apparently, uteruses (uteri?) are, generally speaking, about the size of a fist. As I close out the sixth week of pregnancy, mine is now the size of grapefruit. And little swimmy inside (whose face is forming this week, along with loads of other things) is the size of a sweet pea. Say it with me now: awww. Also, little swimmy now has little flippers, which will eventually become his or her arms.

Despite all these negative physical symptoms of pregnancy, I am happy. And excited. On Friday, senor husband and I will visit the OB for our first prenatal visit. I wonder what will happen. Rumor has it, if the OB does a transvaginal ultrasound, we'll be able to hear the heartbeat. Amazing.